Time has pass me by....

Okay, i'm sorry i haven't written in this blog for awhile... but i needed a long personal break of keeping everything inside me inside. First the last blog i did was on christmas eve, the one i should have written about was the call that came to me on new years eve. Pam called me at 4:20 am asking for me, asking for my voice.. and my heart was hers' again... i keep doing this to myself. I keep myself away from her, i put myself above my pass. Then i begin to forget how her voice sounds and then how her eyes look... and her smell fades... and her touch is almost gone. Then her voice calls out my name, like one last desperate saying of "DO NOT FORGET I EXIST!!!!" Her damning voice soothes what doubt i have of her and me being together.

Damn my hands wanting to caress her face and my voice to say her name... i feel every chamber in my heart aching for her embrace... why can't i wake up not thinking of her... why do i fall in lover with her all over again, why does she insist that i never forget her, that i love her... she has my heart in her hands and my soul on hold...

this time i'm waiting for her and i'm not chasing her...

i felled before and now i know not to land on my face...

db